We live in a world based on duality. This means we are constantly surrounded by light and dark. And even though these opposing energies fluctuate, they also balance each other.
In general, we are usually more on one side or the other. Let’s say neutral is at the 50% mark (0), light would be in the top half from 1 to 50 and dark would be at the bottom half of the graph, from -1 to -50.
In this lifetime, I’ve been on both sides of the scale. I delved down into the dark side between ages 18-40 and on my 40th birthday I did a 180 and went deep into the light. There doesn’t seem to be moderation for me; I needed to experience the extremes and truly experience each side to know what it feels like.
Recently, I had a complete meltdown. It turns out I was being controlled by a demon. For at least 4 months. Looking back, I can clearly see the signs. So obvious now. Hard to decipher at the time.
The 16 Signs
Take a look at the following symptoms of being controlled by a demon, and see if you have any. This is what happened to me.
- I didn’t feel like myself.
- My normal cheery disposition disappeared and I dreaded each day, they were now inconveniences instead of joyous experiences.
- I didn’t want to go out or leave the house.
- I lost all interest in sex or any intimacy with my partner. I didn’t want to be touched.
- I had intermittent headaches. Pain felt in your body is a hint that something may be wrong. A couple times, my neck seized up. I’d wake up unable to turn my head left or right and spend the rest of the day trying to massage the kink out. It would just get worse and worse.
- I became aggressive and bossy. Very short tempered. Unable to communicate rationally and only able to bark out commands I needed executed immediately.
- I “took a break" from my beloved amethyst jewellery. (I usually always wear a large amethyst stone on a necklace and another one in a ring.) Crystals provide protection from darkness.
- I wasn’t in the present moment. For example, I had trouble even watching a movie on Netflix with my family. I was distracted and uninterested.
- Near the end of my four- month “possession” I started feeling extremely ill, hypersensitive and spontaneously erupting into crying fits.
- Stopped going to church or doing any spiritual activities, routines or rituals. My beloved Tarot cards gathered dust.
- Felt like my light had gone out.
- Felt powerless.
- Felt overwhelmed and hopeless.
- Unable to handle any stress.
- Had a feeling I was being followed and fearfully searched the shadows of my house at night.
- And finally, I drove my car into a pole at the local grocery store because I didn’t see it and shouldn’t have been driving while feeling so “off". This was actually my wake up call. Something was really wrong and now it had caused over $8,000 damage to the only piece of property I own worth any financial value. Worse, I could have injured someone.
Why didn’t I recognize the signs?
Well, I have a 16-month old baby who has slept through the night a total of 6 times. That leaves countless other nights where I was woken up every hour or two. I literally was already worn thin and on edge. I interpreted the above-noted signs as side effects from lack of sleep.
Why didn’t someone else recognize the signs?
I hate to say it, but other people are generally too busy and otherwise self absorbed to notice these changes. Also, when a demon is controlling you, you tend to push people away and they don’t want to be around you.
Where do these demons come from?
I’m not a demon expert, but here is one scenario.
Interactions with other humans can be precarious. I have been lucky enough (yeah right!) to run headlong into explosive conflicts with others, be it family, friends, coworkers and clients. (For all you astrology buffs, Pluto is in my first house in the sign of Libra meaning death and transformation to relationships. Not only that, Mars is planted firmly in my 4th house hinting at dominance, aggression and control issues within my family and home.)
Positive interactions transfer positive joyous energy. You can’t really see it with your eyes (or maybe if you are clairvoyant you can), but I can feel it with little tingles. There are some people you just feel better being around. Their vibration is likely at a higher level than yours and being around them brings you up. Similarly, being around lower vibrational people can bring you down and even influence you to do things you wouldn’t normally. This is actually why you are the sum of the people you hang around most.
Flinging Around Dark Energy
Ever heard of thought forms? We create these all the time. And if we start to ruminate on something, the energy starts to build up. If we get stuck on feeling bad about a particular person, we start directing this energy at him or her subconsciously. It travels like Venom’s black web and can stick to the other person (if the conditions are right). If you continue to think dark thoughts about this other person, energetic “roads” are created and provide opportunities for creatures of the night.
Demons everywhere might perk up and start drooling to channel themselves through the dark energy (which is essentially their domain). They start influencing the person sending the “dark vibes" and increasing the intensity. Until voila, they are attached to the end person. Now they are in their happy place, feeding on people in a train of negative emotions. The brighter the light on the target, the more enticing to the demon. (Have you seen Shadow Hunters where Jace is being controlled by a demon to gather victims and he is most attracted to the humans radiating light and goodness? They are pretty much glowing. )
What is a demon’s motivation?
We all come from the light. We all experience darkness. Our collective goal is to return to the light.
Sounds counter intuitive doesn’t it!
So a demon subconsciously wants to be transmuted back to the light. Everything is forgiven. They can return to their highest and greatest form.
Too bad they wreak so much havoc in the process. If the demons aren’t discovered and transmuted, their power and influence continues to increase, which results in the destruction of your life and the loss of everything you value and love.
The Importance Of Forgiveness
Incorporating forgiveness and actively running around fixing and repairing all our relationships should be our number one priority! Also avoiding interpersonal conflicts in the first place will limit your exposure to karmic debts.
Think of the Egyptian tale of Anubis weighing your soul against the weight of a feather. This is mirrored in the Tarot’s number 11 Justice card depicting a woman holding the karmic scale. It’s not too late. We can start fresh today, take ownership for past mistakes, fix what we can, and minimize future hurt.
However, by continuing negative dynamics, we are holding the noose around our own necks. We are sitting ducks to those who would take advantage.
Our Auras Play A Part
Unfortunately, I’ve had a very hard time with my emotions. I had a nervous breakdown in 2008. Even though I’ve been able to heal myself, start a new relationship, create a family and run my own business (i.e. function normally), this nervous breakdown created rips and tears in my energy body.
Every explosive argument with someone since then has served to antagonize or expand these vulnerabilities in me. Unfortunately, I didn’t know the extent of the impact of relationship conflicts until recently and I’ve already done a lot of damage.
The good news is we can work to repair, heal and close our aura. The bad news is I haven’t figured our how yet in order to provide anything helpful here.
Shields And Protection Spells
Another proactive step is to shield and protect yourself (including your home, family, car, etc.) Obviously, since I was just possessed, it got through my defences and I need to do more research in this area. Daily maintenance is in order.
So What Happened?
Yes this story has a happy ending!
This is going to sound sci-fi. I have a friend and colleague who specializes in energy clearing. As a clairvoyant, she spots and clears dark energy attachments, clingons, forms, patterns— it is her superpower. I called her up and said “I don’t feel so hot" and she fixed me within a matter of a couple of minutes, remotely. She’s not the only one out there with these talents either. There’s likely a person in your neighborhood who has skill. Perhaps they don’t advertise it because it’s too woo woo or might start scaring people.
As we go further into the Age of Aquarius, these skilled light workers will become more well known and revered.
How Do I Feel Now?
I feel like I came out of a dark cloud.
I feel lighter.
I feel like my old self.
I have a tonne of energy!
Although this entire topic is strangely disturbing, and you may be wondering if this article is indeed a work of fiction, you might want to take stock regularly as to how you are feeling. You never know what’s out there watching and waiting to feed on your energy.
Why Am I Writing This Article?
Writing this article is risky. I remember I posted something on Facebook about a controversial topic (that most people think is a conspiracy theory) and I got publicly berated by a couple individuals I had considered friends. Or at least Facebook friends.
This isn’t the type of thing you can go to the doctor or hospital with and hope to get resolved. You’ll either get pills or admittance to the psychiatric ward. All you need is an energetic clearing by someone who can sense the invisible.
If something doesn’t feel right, trust your gut and your intuition. Make a list of your usual characteristics and examine any recent changes. Note time lengths, for example, “I haven’t felt like myself since the summer…” There may be a good reason why you feel like crap, and it may not be what you think.